What drives you each day? What makes you want to get out of bed every morning? What gives you inspiration, motivation, and stamina for life? As I contemplated these questions, I thought of many things that give me a passion for living: learning, experiencing, creating, relating, and accomplishing. These are the actions, the “doings”, that come to my mind. But the subjects or goals of these passions, in my life, are God, God‘s creation, people, ideas, concepts, and understanding.
I find fulfillment in accomplishing good work, particularly at achieving excellence or perfection. Examples of this focus in my life have included doing well in school, succeeding in competitive sports and activities, achieving personal goals, earning promotions or commendations, and ticking things off my “to do” list.
However, my life is not whole when I am focused only on accomplishing things. I have come to realize this desire to accomplish is selfish, because it is for the purpose of self-satisfaction and self-actualization. I identify my self worth with what I can accomplish. And that perspective has led me to neglect my relationships with others, including God and my wife. I have neglected the spiritual work of “being,” of loving others and cultivating relationships by simply giving of my time and presence.
I am not unique in this. My German ancestry and American heritage has led me to emphasize hard work, striving for perfection, making something of myself, and personal determination and effort. There is goodness in these things, especially when done to help others or enhance the public good. But when done solely for self-esteem, this reason for existence becomes selfish and greedy.
I believe God led me to an early retirement in order to shift my focus to His calling. He wanted me to give up time and effort devoted to my job and company and devote my time, effort, abilities, and love to my family, church, and people in need. And though I dreamed of endless opportunities for leisure in retirement, most of my activities in my first 18 months of retirement have been focused on church or civic organizations and their goals. To my surprise, I have not devoted much time to home repairs and improvements, financial investing, or my favorite leisure activities of reading, writing, or photography. Although I enjoy or find pleasure or satisfaction in these things, they don’t rise to the level of fulfillment that I find in serving God and neighbor.
I believe it is essential for Christians to ask themselves each day: Am I fulfilling God’s purpose for me? Am I pursuing my life with the passion and talents that God gave me? Test your motivations and see if God has something else in store for you. Or if you receive a strong confirmation that you are aligned with God’s will, then each new day will be a refrain to God’s creation and work in you.
In Christ,
Doug